One Vacation Coming Up!

It's Friday. I am in serious need of a change, I am so bored with myself right now. I realized that I am letting my joy slowly slip away. I need to do something even if its just spinning around in circles so I can get rid of this constant deja vu feeling. Spring is around the corner and I am looking to maxi dresses, sandals, bangles and chandelier earrings. I think I will cut my hair. My hair is in the growing out stage where it's no longer a "cut" or a "style" its just trimmed now. Its driving me nuts! Its too short for one style and too long for the other so I am going to chop it off and deal with my cousin and mom fussing with me. I have to keep my hair at a decent length until the wedding. (We will see, lol). On another note, I really need a vacation. I would love to go to Martinique (I loved To Have and Have Not), and enjoy the sun and sand. I would love a week of thinking about nothing but God's goodness, the sun and when's the best time to go swimming. Who's with me?

ahhhahahaha *crys* Why am i so ADD? or ADHD? (i don't really know the difference) :( i'm suppose to be studying and doing homework but instead i stayed up and it's currently 1 in the morning? and for what reason? NO SELF CONTROL! i know what i should do, but i put it off until the last minute, which usually takes time away from my sleeping schedule. i swear, if this keeps on happening i'm going to get some kind of cancer and die. or i might just get insomia. either way, this is really unheathy.

i seriously need someone to watch over me at all times. will i ever grow up? well, not very soon. i have no idea what i am going to do in university. i'm going die for sure, the temptations of going out and partying ever night? who could resist?! obviously not me since i can't even resist my computer T.T.

when my internet was cut off for 2 days i swear a part of me died. i never really realized how much i relied on the web! for entertainment, education, and just... wasting and procrastinating time! what a bad habbit, but there's just so much to do all the time. like writing this entry...

WHY AM I WRITING THIS ENTRY?! I MUST GO AND... NOT PROCRATINATE! I MUST!.. RESIST!
~Lily <===who's gunna die soon due to this bad habbit

The Only We Have to Fear is Fear Itself

I totally disagree with that statement. Hear me out. As Christians, we shouldn't fear anything or anyone but the Lord. And the fear that we have towards Him is a respect and admiration of who He is and what He can do. I only thought about that quote today because my cousin came to me with a business proposal for my gown line. I love making gowns and everyone thinks I am very talented. I also have a weird obsession with fabrics (lol), but I think the thing that scares me the most is failing. I think I am slowing myself down with stupid questions like: "am I good enough? Would I be creative enough to make it past 5 years?" Blah, blah, blah. I know that this is a stepping stone. If I fail, I fail; but at least I can say I tried. So now I am going to try. I also know that there's life and death in my tongue. So I speak life, creativity, business savy, success, Godly direction into my business. Now, I'm ready to go.

Be a MAN!

There's this one guy I was supposed to have gone on a date with for over a month now, but things keep getting messed up and we cancelled. First I was sick, then we were both busy, then I had my board exam etc etc.

We finally locked down a date... But I didn't hear from him until like 7:30pm that night. He said he had accidently left his phone at home and just got home from work. I was heading out to hip hop class and didn't have time that night so we re-scheduled for Sunday.

Sunday night came around... and at about 8:00pm I got a text from him saying he's too busy and wants to re-schedule... again. Well thank God I didn't get all dressed up or I would have been pissed, but I was kinda mad anyways.

I texted back saying "Don't bother. I'm done."

So what does he do? Email me the next day apologizing and saying that he took the easy way out by texting. Well what is emailing? The even EASIER way out!

Honestly... Why don't guys ever pick up the damn phone and call you anymore? Grab a pair of cojones and dial her number boys! Believe me, she's not THAT scary.

Even worse is when you meet a guy and he wants to give you his number instead of taking yours. I was talking to a guy at the bar the other night and had to get going so I offered to give him my number. Then he started to argue with me about who was going to take whose number. I almost got up and walked away. I guess his point was that if I call him then he knows I'm interested... But I'M the one who offered up my number. Why would you say no?

And what does he do? TEXT me, of course!

Sometimes I wish texting was never invented. Grow up, stop being a pussy and use the phone like it was meant to be used!

Everything you ever wanted (or didn't want) to know about vaginal dilators

I was chilling at home on the couch watching The Real World when Caitlin, the post-op transsexual who used to be a dude and is now a chick, starts talking about her vaginal dilator.

WWWWWHHHHAAATTTT???

It was something I had never thought about before... but I guess it makes sense that you need to stretch it out after surgery or it will heal up... like an earring hole?

This is what I found out on the internet:

"Vaginal dilators need to be used as a post operative aid by transsexuals. Using a dilator is absolutely vital to helping the healing process and preventing narrowing or complete collapse of the newly-formed vagina. The dilation process is essential to ensuring a well formed vaginal opening and indeed to the wellbeing of the whole vaginal structure. Dilation must be regularly carried out daily or twice daily during the first year after gender reassignment surgery. Many surgeons will also advise that dilation of the vaginal cavity should be carried out on a weekly basis for life. Failure to follow recommended dilation procedures can result in the failure of reassignment surgery. "

Interesting. You always hear the jokes about chicks being too loose (the whole hotdog down a hallway thing) but never too tight. Well actually... there was a rumor that went around my high school about this one couple that was dating. She was very petite and he was a big dude and the rumor was that they could only have anal because it "didn't fit." I choose to believe the rumor because I don't like her anyways.

Back to the topic at hand... What this would really be helpful for is drug smuggling. Think about it... I could have so many free trips to Thailand...

"Hey Danielle, where's that kilo of cocaine you were supposed to bring across the border?"

"Don't worry... it's right here in my poon! I'll just stick my arm in and grab it!"

In conclusion, I saved the best for last. A picture. I chose this one because it's the prettiest. Nothing says vaginal dilation like pastels and lilies right?

PS. They have rectal dilators too. I guess in case your hamster gained a few extra pounds? That's a whole nother story.

Hair dye

Okay, I'm going to have a cyber nerdy spazz in the next paragraph complete with grammar and spelling errors. If you do not wish to read nonsense then you may skip this entry.

OMG!! LIKE OMFG!!! like! UHG a few days ago, like my dad didn't pay the ISP and like so they cut off my internet!! i was like WTF!! i'm gunna dieeeeeeeee!!

like seriously you don't understand how painful it was! like i came home fomr school, and i sat there. looking at the freaking screen. just looking. not turning it on or anything. staring blankly at it. my mom thought i finally cracked and was going insane, cuz u know how those crazy ppl are portrayed in movies where they just like sit there and like do nothing but stare. it's creepy but like yeaaa.

so i got uber bored and decided to lighten my hair color (again). this is i had only red dye so like bahhh. it didn't really do anything to my previously DARK brown hair color. fooo shame! wa a waste of dyeee and monehhh1! i want refunds!... but i already used it T.T and it was so messy in the washroom too ehhh.. like red dye everywhere. it looked soooooooo bloddy dusgusting.... perfect for pictures yo! lol i was so stupid, i used ahchole to like try and clean it LMAO! so yeaa :P


and of course like the girl i am, i took a few (A LOT) of pictures lol but mehhh looks the same color........ -.-

Of course there's like wayyyyyyyyyyy more pics lol but like yeaaa i don't wanna like crowd the entry with like MY HEAD!........ unless you want me to? lol

comment for more bloody pictures, or me after the dye... lol hmm i should like put a before and after thing! ok here: (and it's taken from my web cam so u can't tell the color even more lol)
and i got like a few videos of the process... hollaaa for the videos in the comments yo! :P

Location, Location, Location!

I love living in New York. Really I do; but when there are things like Blizzard (a Christian youth retreat) in Ohio, Erynn Mangum book signing in Texas, and Christian rock concerts everywhere but New York; I wonder sometimes if New York is the best city to be a young Christian? All these amazing Christian events I read about and love to be apart of are in other states that would require me to fly to get there (mind you, I am afraid of heights). The only event that is in New York is Kingdom Bound, and that's Upstate New York! Oh the humanity! I would love to see Salvador, Above the Golden State (sigh), Leeland (I LOVE THEM!) in concert but it would mean I would have to travel to see them......
Now that I have gotten that off my chest. I am so looking forward to Laura Jensen Walker's new book "Turning the Paige". Its the second book in the "Getaway Girls" series. I absolutely loved the first book "Daring Chloe", it was hilarious. I hope it gives you a follow up to Chloe because I am eager to know what happened to her. Anywho, I am such a dork. I called Barnes and Noble (I am a proud member)and had them order a copy for me (Christian Chick-Lit isn't carried much in bookstores) as soon as the book was released. I was on alibris.com (The Godsend of discount book sites!) and found out that I ordered over 40 books from October 2007 and January 2009! That doesn't count the books I bought from Barnes and Noble. I knew something was up when my books and fashion magazines started to take over my room, lol. I won't complain, because when it comes down to it I wouldn't resell them. I love reading and rereading books. I like that these books entertain me and speak to my spirit (not to mention many of the characters are as crazy as me); so what more can a girl ask for? Well Starbucks, Mr.Darcy, and Haagen-Daz Dulce de Leche ice cream (lol).