Emotionally Promiscuous

I awake; my head hurts, the light is too bright.

What time is it? What happened last night?
All the events come back to me; I throw the covers over my head in shame.
I realized I have been promiscuous again; but not with my body, with my emotions.


This seems to be something effecting the youth in the church lately. We like someone, throw our emotions on them with our baggage and don’t even consider the fact if they want it. I know I have been guilty of it more than once. My emotions run ahead of me, filling my mind with daydreams and expectations; and suddenly it ends. You see them for who they are really or they are not as amazing as you imagined them to be and now you’re left with the aftermath. They return your baggage with a few additional pieces. I have even been guilty of emotional one night stands: you meet someone, you get along (you think you two “clicked”) and you proceed to imagine how you will tell your children how you met; only to never see or talk to that person again. And if you do see them again, the conversation or “connection” wasn’t as it was before.

What also makes emotional abstinence even harder is when we’re in relationships. We normally start out wrong; we date someone to get to know them when really we should be hanging out with each other and keeping the romantic aspect of the relationship at bay. If we keep our emotions in check, than we can keep our bodies in check. We need to think about relationships the way God intended, not the way the world does. In Romans 12:2 (KJV) states “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, acceptable, and perfect will of God”. And I can say the perfect will of God is not throwing our emotions at each other or giving them away so freely. When you look at that verse it tells us if we don’t think like the world and have our minds renewed we will know what is good, what is acceptable and what is perfect in God’s will. One thing that is good, acceptable and perfect in the will of God is: The Fruit of the Spirit Self-Control (Galatians 5:22-23, or temperance in the KJV).

Self- Control is defined by the dictionary as “the act of denying yourself; controlling your impulses.” In everyday terms you can define it simply as controlling yourself. In this day and age, denying yourself or controlling your impulses is unheard of. But that definition alone is part of being a Christian. When we accept Christ it’s all about denying those fleshy things that try to drag us downward and away from God and allowing the Spirit to reign in us and over our lives so we can walk and be led by Christ. So, to tie this in with emotional promiscuity, we need to practice ALL the fruits of the Spirit to be able to protect our heart but also to make sure we don’t act on “impulses” but act in accordance with the Spirit’s leading…..This entry took a lot longer than I planned, but I hope that this blesses you. As God reveals more of Himself to me and shows me where I’m coming up short, it makes me want to share with others because I know there are many of us willing to be set apart and stand up for Christ. Be blessed.

How to Get to My Heart

"A woman's heart should be so close to God that a man should have to chase Him to find her."


— C.S. Lewis

Protecting Hearts

This is probably one of the hardest entries to write. I don't like to talk about myself and relationships; I have no clue why. But as I started to think about what I wanted to say, I found myself staring at a blank page or deleting and rewriting my entry. The problem isn't that I don't have anything to say but I have too much to say. One of the things I am learning is that Christians are starting to have a serious battle scars by the time they get into the right relationship. I say that because I find myself in the same conversations, praying for the same things for so many because we don't protect our hearts. I am convinced that God has been doing some serious heart surgery lately. We get into relationships without praying, seeking guidance and/or direction and then when we're in too deep we want to start up dialogue with God about something that we originally had as a monologue. What's the worst part? We suffer a pain/hurt/heart break that closes us off the one that God has intended for us; leaving that person to climb gates/walls/electric fences or whatever we decided to place around our hearts. Is that fair? No, of course not. So what do we do to avoid it all together? If we treat our hearts the way we are supposed to treat our bodies (keeping it pure and for marriage) we won't have to worry about heartbreak. I have experienced this for myself; I was in a relationship and didn't seek God's guidance until I was too deep in. When God revealed to me that he wasn't the one for me, I was a mess. Let's just say 3 1/2 years later I can finally say that my heart is healed. To be able to finally wake up and not dread the pain in your chest, to be able to not hurt over the memories, wishes, and dreams is a feeling I thought I would never experience but now I do. All of this could have been avoided if I sought God first.

That chapter has come to an end, and the chapter begins with you seeking God to remove the pain (which He does) and starts to do a new thing in you. But for God to do a new thing in you, there are things that has to die and be removed. Think about it, if you were where you needed to be in God would you be in the situation you are in now? No, of  course not. We were more concerned with self (flesh) than our relationship with God. So, if you though heartache was a horrible pain, wait until God puts you in the fire to remove the impurities.  All those old, nasty, dormant habits has to removed/plucked/burned away. But don't worry, its for the best. You can't be used right now when you have random outbursts, or you have a lusting issue. You can't be used right now when you still like to party or if you have a gambling issue. Remember, we are supposed to be building up God's kingdom, not tearing it down. Once God has cleaned you, burned up those things in you that are not of Him you feel lighter, happier, at peace. It's an amazing and wonderful feeling. You actually look forward to God doing more purging in your life because it draws you closer to Him, and you had a taste of God that makes you want more. Living without Him no longer becomes an option. His love for you and your love or Him changes everything: decisions, plans, outlooks, etc.

And we reach the next installment......